Feeling: Sleepy
Watching: [Death Note] anime on utube
Location: Lab4
Ok i was gone for longer than i expected. I am getting so nua nowadays that i cant really be bothered to blog anymore. Ohya i forgot about something.
Its kinda belated, but oh well better late than never right?
Happy birthday to Leonard and Sheeweng on 2nd nov~
& HAppy birthday to Raymond n Youngsaeng on 3rd nov~
Err just in case some pple may have queries how come i can rem some of the birthdays, credit it to friendster mail. =) My memory aint usually that good.. hmm just that 26 jan 1986, 6 feb 1986, 4 june 1986, 15 dec 1986 n 18 feb 1988 are stuck in my brains. Heh i swear my memory cache has a separate compartment labelled 'dbsk'. =p
Hmm ok, not that close to the first 3 pple i mentioned but the last one deserves special attention! Haha its my dear youngsaeng's birthdae..
Ok this pose kinda reminds me of jaejoong..the same forlorn look. Heh.
Credit to: http://fan.kichisu.org/hys/
Okie youngsaeng & friends! Heh i love this kind of casual pics where everyone is smiling..
For the uninitiated (to SS501), from left to right to back, its heo youngsaeng, kim hyun joong, kim hyung joon, kim kyu jong and park chung min.
So youngsaeng, saeng il chukkahae!! (sorry in lab now so cant type korean) mani saranghae~ <33 Hehz...
Ok back to my blog proper.
Ehh the main reason for my 2 week hiatus is actually because i was hmm just depressed lor. Fed up with my fyp, and i still cant help but harp on the fact that i really shouldnt be in my hons year. Its just not right LAR. But oh well, seems like my fervent prayers work and my fyp is finally seeing some light. Suddenly its like making such a big leap from fetal stage to toddler phase. -_-""
Heh ok whatever im gonna say now is going to sound silly to alot of pple but i dun really care. Its like i was in this really pathetic, dying state one night when i was grumbling again to my mum to let me quit sch (yes the thought really occurred to me n i think i asked my mum abt it for like 3, 4 times?) den well of cos she din agree so she scolded me, saying that i dun take things seriously blah..so i was so sad lar. I mean i know that if i was to quit now its super dumb but at the same time i know that i really loathe fyp n yr4 n honestly i felt like i was a flower that was withering away..i got til so sian of everything so when i came to lab (somemore angel wasnt in my lab n i was left with V, G and A) i just did whatever they said n din bother to argue cos i wasnt even thinking..
So i was just like a zombie, a puppet watever. It din help that i couldnt get my kremen out despite repeated attempts while everyone else was like alreade a few steps ahead of me. But of cos I din appear that i was really feeling hopeless when i was in sch cos i see no point in doing so. N although the prof din tell us straight in the face, it was obvious that he was worried also n it was as if he was always there, breathing down my neck. Furthermore, it was so suay that the few times he dropped by the lab i would be waiting during incubation time again n he always had this disapproving look on his face when he saw that i was using the comp.
So i reached the stage when i was on the verge of giving up n i really felt like just quitting school so i wun need to bother anymore. Since it was virtually impossible, in the end i turned to my dbsk again. For a few days, even looking at jaejoong din really help to cheer me up. Whole dae i was just in a dazed n sian mode. Until one night i was watching some clip n for the first time i saw the MV for [Free your mind] with chinese subs and there was this line in the song...
To be continued...